Home » Relationships » Overcoming karmic relationship by discovering that “you are more precious to yourself, than your lover is to you”

Overcoming karmic relationship by discovering that “you are more precious to yourself, than your lover is to you”

Journey of returning home

Karma is a teacher

Learn the lesson and be responsible for the consequences of your own actions and your own happiness

Karma is cause and effect resulting from our inappropriate actions with people, and as we learn to correct the pattern… we find balance.


Karma holds you up against the other person in such a way that your experience of them is over-the-top intense. It holds you up against the wall or the other person, so you can’t move, forcing you to look at it. Karma gives you NO choice, it holds you there  and the very moment you see the illusion in it, and you take back your power, it drops you. Then sets you free, and from there we find new relationships with new lessons and new opportunities for growth.

Each lesson learned moves our soul toward wholeness and home to God.

“Everything” that we think or do that is out of alignment with God is recorded and cataloged, and needs to be payed back. The action of this payback is karma.

Karma that is seen as a beautiful thing we call dharma, as in being paid back for good deeds [good deeds seen by humans and good deeds seen by Spirit can be two very different things].
who’s in control of your happiness
Bringing karma to completion does not mean ending the relationship. It means transforming your awareness,  As in keeping clear of your individual identity in all its forms; you’re not getting lost in the other person. So the other person is not responsible for making you happy. You’re following your own happiness and your lover is along for the fun, as you are for them.

Ego’s romantic love with conditions of love and with attachments vs spiritual love in ego-less relationship

Karma teaches us how to heal from ego’s romantic love, with all its sacrifices, pain and suffering, hoping for something better, and dread “here we go again”. By doing our inner emotional work, as in learning to respond from love instead of fear, and overall giving command to the obedience of the Higher-self [the lower-self is ego and “poor me”, the higher-self is “God in action” in you]. Which leads into the quiet waters of spiritual love, where support is granted for any direction you choose.

karma has to do with an unbalanced ego, and lack of connection to your Higher Self [that higher source that governs your good-will].
Karma is a spiritual term, it describes a need to come back into physical, mental, emotional and spiritual balance resulting from cause and effect, from our own emotional reactions with people past and present.
When we have a personality clash with our lover and we can’t seem to get past it, or no-matter what terrible thing was said and horrific thing was done… we keep going back for more. The act of “attraction” is divinely designed to hold you steady with that person, so the karmic lesson can unfold.  all love and hate relationships are moving in the direction of your personal growth for spiritual resolve. On its way to wholeness. This is the master design. However, karma comes in ways other than just relationships. Many diseases are karmic.

Anytime there is something that can’t be avoided and you have to go through the experience of it … is karmic.  It’s all here to give us the opportunity to look at it in a different way, and bring it back into balance.

If we abuse someone, we will come back and be on the receiving end of that abuse, in order to understand and come to the balance of compassion. So if you find yourself in an unavoidable situation, this is what you’re here for. And the way to shorten that experience, is to connect to compassion through the art of forgiveness. Compassion for yourself for this amazing journey you’re on, and compassion for them for helping you to find balance.

The desire of having a relationship succeed comes because the attraction is So Great, and the experience can feel very powerful. Who wouldn’t want it to succeed. Karma’s one of those things that when we start to look at it, patterns begin to emerge that show the truth of it. When our conscious understanding moves beyond a certain point, we can no longer go back to our old understanding.

Wanting a karmic relationship to work, is a bit like thinking you can be your authentic self, while in the presence of the most beautiful person in the world to you. You may for the first 10 minutes, although by the end of the day you will become someone else. This nonalignment is deliberately designed by God to teach us non-attachment and impermanence. Because in truth, only the God realm is permanence.

In karmic relationsip we want to give to the other person more time, more love, more attention than to ourselves. Karma is that imbalance.

Pure devotion does not need to say that it’s being loyal, devotion is the automatic action of loyalty. If you need to tell someone you’re going to be loyal to them, then your coming from a place of hesitation. Devotion as pure as it is, is still karma. If we sacrifice ourselves for the devotion of others, we create self-karma. This is what imbalance between giving to others and giving to ourselves looks like. Even though the ego will insist that you are worth much less, and other people deserve more than you have. So this is why we learn to tone down the dark character of ego, and learn to give our attention to the God-self / higher self / higher power. Our God-self is in fact in love with us, where the ego-self is not. To learn to think and feel with our hearts keeps us connected to the God-self.

Choosing an ego-less relationship is choosing to act from a love response instead of a fear response.

Transparency is the backbone of an Ego-less relationship. 

No walls, no bars, no locks… and absolutely no pointing fingers, therefore no miss communications.

This life for me is one in which I’m tying-up karmic loose ends, and will do what ever it takes to bring it to completion. Doesn’t mean that I’m not going to enjoy the experience, or that the love I express is not real.

 All paths lead to God, and karma is the block that falls across that path.

A karmic relationship is where our unbalanced ego has gotten involved in our interactions with other people. When we learn what a dysfunctional ego looks like, we can begin to be more responsible with our emotional reactions, and step into the empowerment of ego-less relationships.

Ending a karmic relationship means that you connect to the beautiful and unique YOU, and in a profound way that wants you to be the master of your own direction.

Only you can truly see you, and only you can truly know what you need. When we put the responsibility on someone to provide for us, we have created a situation that will fail.

Acting from personal power is living in empowerment of knowing the direction of your life is YOURS!!!

Be in love with someone because they are fun to be with, and not because they complete you.

ONLY you can complete you. For anyone else to do that, it’s just a guessing game. So in this, karma shows us what is illusion and what is truth,

the illusion is made to be a difficult path to follow, and the truth is made to be easy. 

The more conscious you become of the history and message of your karmic connection with your partner or yourself, the less easy it’ll become to ignore the actions that must follow. It’s God’s will that we learn and overcome.

The only one that can love you more than life itself is God, and because his love is not physical we search for it in other people. And karma is here to teach that there is only God. The only true validation comes from Spirit. When we seek validation in people, what we get is a projection from their emotional life experiences. Which is divinely designed to not ever match your truth.

So the gift of life is to connect to the God within you, that most precious gift that you are… above anything else. When we see and connect to this, we are now empowered with the light of truth.

When we participate in the ego-less relationship, then we are in a relationship of balance and free of bad dysfunctional karma, and if for some reason your emotions become unbalanced, you simply take some alone time or keep quiet until it clears.

To make a relationship work takes focus and attention. Love and passion are something that needs nurturing and space to grow, all relationships need breathable space; time together and time with friends. Keep talking about the things that matter, pay attention to the things that don’t work, and continue asking yourself “what is it that I can do with you, that is positively different from yesterday”?

To remove karma from any situation, we move away from the dysfunctional ego, and into a space that supports us standing on our own two feet and living with empowerment. Within that environment we find God/Spirit/Divine. So if you’re interested in a lasting love relationship, then immerse yourself in it. The karma will work itself out. However, if your interested in completing your karmic cycles, then you can expect your connections with people to faze out, and your connection with God to faze in. If you’re interested in karma, it’s simply because your spirit knows it’s gearing up to cycle off the planet. The irony of coming the the end of all things, is that we truly begin to see the big picture, and that becomes the focus of our attention.

Overcoming relationship karma means to discover that “you are more precious to yourself, than your lover is to you”.

And this standard becomes how you navigate all relationships. Only you know exactly what it is that you need, the other person is just guessing.
Giving into the urge to have sex with a karmic connection, keeps karma active. Shifting your attention away from sex and affection, and into self-empowerment / self-loyalty, dims karma’s light and it’s hold on you.

How to burn through karma: When processing emotionally charged issues that we have no control over: By immersing ourselves in the emotion of it without getting caught up in the story of it,  we can then choose to “feel” the experience of it , without engaging in the “expression” of it. By this we burn through the emotional charge [anger, resentment, guilt, regret… ], attachment or karma of that connection, and we begin to experience freedom from that issue, person or situation.

Karma is your lesson to learn, and because it comes from the Loving Spirit of Truth, there is NO WAY for you to avoid it.

Any human relationships are a borderline mess
A truth about karma, is it’s an issue that belongs only to you. If you have karma with (P); lover, friend, brother… , whatever the issue is, it is yours to work through, “P” is only here to show you just what the issue is, and if he has issues with you then that is his work to do. The attraction you have is Divinely designed so you will not be able to avoid the lesson. Understanding and learning how to navigate karma is learning how to see the forest through the trees; or understanding the secret mystery of life.
What Spirit is trying to teach us through the lessons of karma, is that we as individuals are very precious and the only true relationship is with God. When we live in the empowerment of an ego-less relationship and practice healthy boundaries life comes at us with joy, and when we follow this path off the map… we find God. And that dear one, is us coming full cycle. The closer we are to God, or “the action of God”, the further we are from ego.

How long does karma last in relationships? It lasts as long as it takes for you to learn the lesson.
Karma is God’s way of holding us accountable for our own emotional reactions with others – past and present.

When your expressions are centered; not angry, they are more productive.

Being with someone who doesn’t see or understand you (being in an abusive relationship) is a relationship divinely designed just for you to heal and overcome this issue.

All karma is in situations that give you that “can’t live without” feeling, or that “can’t live with” feeling in relationships. To take this precious love you have for someone who doesn’t see you, and give it to yourself instead. This is where we stop being a servant to others and start being a servant to ourselves. When you see your own self in a finer light than anyone else can, then you’ve crossed over into personal empowerment. And once you’ve crossed over, the relationships that you allow in your life, will treat you the way you do for yourself or better. Anytime someone treats you from a place of “less than”, then a boundary is created.
Navigating karma requires one to pay attention, gently doing your inner emotional work [letting go of anger, guilt, shame or… and creating peace within yourself, about any given situation that pushes your emotional buttons], and surrounding yourself [not them] with empowerment. Karma takes us away from, or out of balance with self empowerment. And as we learn to surround ourselves with self empowerment, we draw in relationships or situations of balance!

When we are pushed into feelings of death, because we feel that is the only way out. When in truth the part of us that needs to die is NOT the physical body, it is a part of the emotional body that needs a cleansing. As we go through adolescence we adopt behavioral traits that help us to survive that transition, and all those emotions that come with the explosion of the chemistry in our bodies. However as we move into adulthood, we no longer need those survival traits. In fact, survival traits and a deep meaningful relationship don’t match, to have one we have to let go of the other.
So when we have a need to die, it is really Spirit coming forward to remind us of what it is that no longer serves us, that needs to fall away. A gentle transitioning in our behavior.

Gay men are learning how to navigate and process emotional/sensitivities.
Gay women are learning how to navigate and process power/emotions.
Karma doesn’t care whether you want to do this or not. Your soul needs to learn this lesson to overcome this issue, and have this experience so it can take the next step along its journey.

The truth in all of this is that karma is every where, it’s a description of the process of learning. It’s when we get caught up in the finer details in such a way that it holds us back from living, then we know we are taking this all too seriously.

Why do people get into karmic relationships? By choosing to identify with the ego, we look away from God [ego and God are complete opposites]. Karma teaches us that “there is only God”. All relationships are karmic in nature, every relationship has something to teach you, every emotional interaction creates the opportunity to respond from either fear or love. Either we are identifying with the ego-self or with the god-self.
Do affairs create bad karma? YES they do very much. The only way that it won’t, is if all people involved are aware of each other, and willing to share… and checking with everyone is something you do before the affair.

If you have an affair, will your karma get you? Yes, eventually it will, either in this life or the next, and it will come forward when you least expect it.

Those who will break your heart will face karma? No, not necessarily. If the quality in their heart has them following their own inner personal power and truth, than no.
If they do it to deliberately to hurt you, or you were a pawn in their scheme and you got caught up in their personal gain, then yes.
Will karma teach lesson to my boyfriend who left me? Another person’s karma is between them and their creator. When we step in and play god, and do something or even speak ill-will about them, we are drawing to our experiences that person’s karmic lessons, or at least creating karma for ourselves. it’s a good practice “to turn the other cheek”, or “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”.

Does walking away end karmic ties? No, it’s more than just that. It’s more about you stepping into your independence, and becoming your self-empowerment. [example] Walking away from someone because he’s a bully isn’t enough, learning the lesson and stepping into your power, is. This in turn elevates your vibrational frequency, and removes the target on your chest. When your self worth is low so is your vibrational frequency, bullies will only go after those with low self esteem. Step into empowerment and elevate your frequency. Bully or not, self empowerment is the action part of one’s elevated vibrational frequency. Karma is the opposite of God, and God is the higher frequency.

How do you know I have balance or karmic connection? A karmic connection comes with the feeling of “I must have, can’t live without” or even “can’t live with” feeling attached to it. A less-karmic connection is like two strangers looking at the same painting, then sharing something unique about it, and then parting ways. A karmic connection is one in which you have invested time, energy and emotions with that person. A less-karmic connection is free, the connection is there simply because you both are looking in the same direction. The chance’s of you having a less-karmic relationship are pretty small.

Why can’t I let him go? Because you have a lesson to learn with this person. The moment you do the “right” thing, you will feel the chapter close. It helps to understand this process consciously so you don’t repeat it, however it’s not required.

What is a karmic match? It’s a situation in which your lessons match theirs, and can create the opportunity for a gentle passage through the lesson. Because you help each other navigate through it.
Is heavy attraction for someone karmic? Yes.
Can a relationship bring karma into your life? Well, how do you treat each other throughout the relationship? Is there abuse of any kind going on? There is karma with another person, and there is self karma. They both come from responding without compassion either to each other or to yourself.

It’s not about being right, seen, heard or in control, it’s about having the space to be the beautiful and unique person you are.

Choose not to listen to the voice of the ego. choose to listen to the voice of love.
Why do karmic relationships hurt? Because if they were consistently warm and fuzzy you would not want to move to change. Mental and emotional pain pushes us to move toward growth and wholeness within ourselves in very profound ways. When you connect to self-value; self-worth, emotional pain becomes shorter. A place where we begin to experience what it’s like living in empowerment. When we connect to self-worth in this profound way, those who treat us in a painful way get pushed out of our lives. Therefor the experience of emotional pain becomes shorter and shorter, and the lesson is learned and the karma is resolved.
Whats a non karmic relationship? Let go of ego and embrace love.

Types of karmic relationships? How many grains of sand are on a beach? Each person’s karmic path is completely unique, according to what it is that, that person needs to learn for their soul’s journey.
What is my karmic relationship trying to teach me? That which you don’t want to face; what you’re avoiding. Everything that pushes your emotional buttons, and when we don’t turn and face those issues, they become situations we must go through to arrive on the other side… at resolve.
Do all karmic relations end in breakups? No. It all depends on the lesson and reason you’re in this in the first place, how long will that take, because it can take just a moment or a lifetime.
Should you go back to a karmic relationship? Is it abusive?  If you have a need to go back, then it’s not finished. If the other person doesn’t see or understand you the way you hoped, then it is a one-sided karmic relationship, and going back will put you through more unnecessary pain. Your peaceful way out is self forgiveness, and you don’t need them to do this process.

How many times can you be in the same karmic relationship? As often as it takes to learn the lesson. God wants you to connect to the value and precious gift that you are, in such a way that That inner worth is always held in Light.
Is it okay to reconnect after a karmic relationship ends? As friends yes, as lovers no. If you heal karmic bonds with someone then go back and end up having sex, it’ll be like the healing never took place. A physical attraction you can not avoid is Karma with attachment. When our love attractions are blinding and we have attachments to people who no longer serve us, then those actions become destructive for our personal development and our life begins to resemble a mess.
* Can we stay in a karmic relationship if we want? Yes! And when Spirit feels it’s time for your growth to move forward, they will step in and provoke change. All human relationships are divinely designed to move you forward in your personal growth, in the direction of wholeness. Karma is a way of describing that growth.

Karma can be the story, however, as the humans we are, we have a tendency to get caught up in story and forget why and where we’re going.

Should you consciously break a karmically linked relationship? Yes, by joyfully following the direction of your own path.

If you find yourself in a steep karmic relationship, and you step out without resolving the issue. Then you’ll just be dragging that lesson into the next relationship. For the most of us: karma teaches us how to live in empowermentwhile in a relationship.
How to know when it’s time to end a karmic relationship?  Karma moves faster when we’re looking at it, because it becomes a conscious movement. However, it doesn’t matter if we’re looking at it or not, because of the subconscious it has a natural flow towards resolve. The truth is karma wants to be a conscious decision, because there are so many more layers of it that come to the surface and get resolved.

Can a karmic relationship turn into a karmic free relationship? Yes, by actively practicing an ego-less relationship. This relationship is non traditional, and may change your life in all directions very dramatically. This path is work at first, it takes focus and attention, and knowledge of how ego interferes in our lives.

How to break a karmic relationship? Through forgiveness for yourself and or others, connect to your self-worth in such a way that you love yourself first before you love another person, and the love that you do give to another is the overflow of love you have for yourself. In other words, make yourself first. What makes a relationship a karmic one is that we have [from a place of imbalance] placed the other person first. I know we’re taught this from the beginning, this is ego… this action comes from fear, fear of losing or rejection. Connecting to self-worth insures that everyone that you become involved with shows a similar quality of love. Otherwise it becomes a deal-breaker; or that which breaks down trust.

How do you know if karma is resolved? It has a completed feeling to it, like a weight has been lifted from you, or you have an inner knowing that you will not have to go through this again. The attraction melts and fades. When you step into your power and out of an abusive relationship, you know the karma is complete when you’re no longer having those kind of relationships.

What happens when a karmic circle has completed? You will connect to compassion with that person in a very profound way. Having compassion instead of intense attraction is a sign of completion. When you finish a cycle with one person, there will be another to fill in that space. As long as you are in the physical body karma will always be there to keep you moving forward.

If you know what it is you want in a relationship, it’s up to you to navigate your way to it. Standing in your power is you taking charge of your own happiness, and making sure you get your needs met. Giving up our power is giving up the control and direction of our happiness to another person. Karma is the sign that we are crossing that line in giving up our power. All karmic issues are guidelines to bring us back into being the navigator of our own happiness… as a co-creator with God. And NOT a co-creator with your partner.

Have the practice of seeing God in EVERYONE. Learn the lesson of compassion.
Learn to walk away from hate, and learn to love instead of fight.

If there are people in your life who push your emotional buttons, and the only true path through that relationship is forgiveness… forgiveness without judgement. And if all else fails and you still can’t get past the conflict, then step away from them and away from the situation through the act of self-loyalty.

Because karma is a spiritual expression, we can either choose to get very involved in the navigation of it, or we can just let it all go, and the work of the subconscious will continue to march us forward on its own.

The text is extract – summary essence of

source: Eart Connections

by DG


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